"Hello, Beautiful Sharon,

Step back from preconceived opinions. Get curious and notice when you are judging others as not good enough. Note when you're writing them off because of a behavior, weight, age, dress, how they talk, skin color, accent, politics, religion, education, or sexual orientation. Be willing to see beyond your judgments and see their beauty. When you do, you'll be blessed, and your world will be bigger and more beautiful."

The Joy Energy 

I had a friend who I felt had let me down when I needed her.

When I stepped back from my judgment about her around that incident and looked to see the best of her, I saw her very differently.

I remembered lots of beautiful things about her and my judgments melted away. It was such a good feeling to feel good about her.

Those soft feelings allowed me to see how at that particular time I had been abundantly supported, it just had come through different friends at that time. 

This reminded me to not judge myself so harshly for an incident or moment. Instead, it would serve me to give myself grace and encourage myself forward by remembering those beautiful moments when I was at my best.

Years ago I was having a drink in a bar with two other women.

An older very drunk but amiable fellow came up and offered to buy us drinks.

They said sure and derisively laughed at him, clearly showing him they thought he wasn't worthy of any respect.

I gently declined and thanked him, and tears came to his eyes, "He said, thank you, thank you for treating me like a "real person", then he left.

When I revisit that memory it reminds me, we all want to be treated as "real people."

We all want to feel loved, valued, good enough, and worthy. 

I think of a brief conversation I had with a homeless fellow, back when I lived in Chicago, sleeping in our vestibule.

My roommate had sent me down to wake him up and ask him to leave so she could get out.

He looked to be in his 70's, his clothes were tattered and stained. I had trepidations about waking him up and asking him to leave. Would he be violent or angry?

But when I roused him, he apologized for blocking the exit. 

He explained he had just wanted a warm place to sleep.

He was a soft-spoken gentle soul. And asked if he might trouble me for a glass of water to take his medications and then he'd be on his way.

I fetched him a glass of water along with a little money and he was so appreciative.

As he took his medications and drank the water, he shared a little bit about his life.

I don't remember all the details other than he was a war veteran and had been a husband and father.

What I remember most was it felt good to see him as a real person.

And it seems to me it felt good to him to remember those things about himself.

"There is no greater gift than feeling good in the now moment."

Sharon

Latest Joyshot-Free Yourself Of Negative Judgments
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https://www.audioacrobat.com/play/WJqDv2FF

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  "I ... came to Sharon to be less controlling and free myself of expecting the worst... Leaving behind fears and worries ... changed everything... Family relationships are better. Instead of feeling guilty, fearful or critical, I ... support and love them ... with results of ... more peace... and ... healthier boundaries. ... I didn’t socialize...I felt socially awkward... now I am friendly and spontaneous, have more friends, and feel more comfortable and free to do what makes me feel good. I used to have an uncomfortable relationship with my body and food... now I ... do more ... walks ... working out at the gym ... eating in balance ... ... when family or anyone has strong opinions I don’t agree with, I can listen to them without it affecting my life negatively. It is so freeing. ... when life happens ... accidents ... unexpected events ... instead of ... throwing me into panic or ... suffering, I can be peaceful ... by imagining good things ... [I] know when to step back, or move forward with positive actions ... "
  Donna Sevilla

  Garden Valley, ID

   

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